The news
out of spring training for the White Sox keeps getting worse. Bobby Jenks can’t
throw strikes, and as a result Ozzie proclaims he doesn’t believe in naming a
closer. He’ll go with his gut. Ozzie’s gut isn’t as plentiful as Jenks’ but I’m
ok with this strategy. I worry about the consistency of our lineups throughout
a long season as well as the pecking order in the bullpen. It must be rough not
knowing when your number is going to be called. I know that if my boss gave me
a job and yanked it from me one day, only to give it back to me 2 days later, I’d
go bonkers. I might also wonder about the boss’ mental stability. We all knew
this day was coming. Neil Cotts is going to be our closer when it’s all said
and done. The seeds have been planted. Here is my message to Big Bobby: Find
the strike zone as often as you find that Chili’s down the street.
There are a lot of questions about the White Sox this year. Most
of these questions trend towards the positive. We’re not wondering if they will
make the playoffs, or how many months into the season will it take them to
reach .500. No, the championship has turned the staunchest pessimist into an
optimist. Speaking of questions, I found a few on the Cheat’s blog. (yes, I’m
spreading the link love) I’ll take a
stab at answering them here:
Will Dustin Hermanson
ever pitch again?
No. Back problems are the worst kind of problems to have if
you are pitcher. This is especially true if you have 2 arms. I’m afraid I don’t
see Dustin doing much more than chewing tobacco this year.
Is Scott Podsendik
still on his honeymoon?
No, he isn’t. But he should be. Have you seen his beautiful
wife? I’d be coming to work smiling every day.
Is Bobby Jenks off
the wagon?
I get confused with off the wagon, or on the wagon. Whatever
wagon he might be on, it’s big. I’m surprised our resident magician Coop hasn’t
sent him on that show The Biggest Loser.
Man alive this kid needs to get it together. Hurry up Bobby.
Who's the closer when
Jenks is off filming the next episode of Celebrity Fit Club?
I liked the joke about Celebrity Fit club – but isn’t that a
BBC show? Regardless, the answer is Cotts.
What about Jim
Thome's health?
What about it? He’s fine. Big Frank played on one leg, Thome
can do it too. I appreciate the staff being cautious with him. The question
should be “Will Thome be healthy for at least 100 games.”
Did Jose Contreras'
arm turn to dust yet?
Yes. It was replaced last week with a robotic
arm. (take the jump, it’s cool)
Is Iguchi headed back
to the #2 hole?
Yes. I bet he’s glad he decided to skip on the WBC. He has
something like 4 hits this pre-season? Nice.
Can Don Cooper fix
Matt Thornton?
I have no idea. It would be a miracle from everything I have
read. If he does fix Matt Thorton, does Coop finally get a job as manager
somewhere?
It’s time to get back to work. Hang in there everybody.
Tomorrow is Friday.